New Rules

I haven't followed men's soccer since I was a kid. The sport has become virtually unwatchable in my opinion. Seeing players fall over at the slightest (even imaginary) touch, waste time so obnoxiously when they're ahead, and, worst of all, show aggression to officials is beneath unedifying. Why can't the sport endow officials with the kind of power rugby does?

This might sound odd to anyone who doesn't watch rugby, but the biggest name in the sport's history isn't the legendary player Jonah Lomu, but Nigel Owens, a Welsh referee. Every referee in rugby is exceptional — they keep almost four metric tonnes of muscle from tearing each other to pieces over eighty minutes of full-contact (you wonder how deaths are so rare. But Nigel Owens was something else. He commanded respect from the players on the field, and in most cases earned their affection, too. I'm talking in the past tense due to his retirement — he's still with us. The only question is: Why no British government has made him a Lord?

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